AUTO SALESPERSON: May I help you?
CUSTOMER: Well, not really.
SALESPERSON: Okay.
CUSTOMER: I mean, I'm just looking.
SALESPERSON: Yep, that' s fine.
CUSTOMER: That is, I'm not planning to buy a car today.
SALESPERSON: I understand.
CUSTOMER: At least, I don't think I'm going to buy a car today. Well,
suppose I wanted to buy a car today, what would you recommend?
SALESPERSON: Well, uh . . . how much are you expecting to spend?
CUSTOMER: Gee, I really hadn't given it much thought. I hadn't really
planned on buying a car today, you know. Hmm . . . let's say 79 cents.
SALESPERSON: For a car?
CUSTOMER: Well, not a four-door, of course.
SALESPERSON: I'm afraid I'd have a little trouble finding a car to
recommend in that price range.
CUSTOMER: It's funny, I had the same problem over at the school bus
dealership.
SALESPERSON: Tell me, did you really want a school bus?
CUSTOMER: No, I really wanted an avocado.
SALESPERSON: An avocado?
CUSTOMER: Well, you wouldn't expect me to make guacamole with a
school bus, would you?
SALESPERSON: Well, no, but --
CUSTOMER: I mean, where would I find a paper bag big enough to get it
to ripen properly?
Copyright Jonathan Caws-Elwitt.